menometrorrhagia

Rant 1:  What stings the most about this season is that everything that needed to happen for the Longhorns to get back in the NC mix happened, except for them beating two weak teams.  K-State sucks, but at least they had to have a 50+ yard FG to win.  But ATM kicked the Longhorns ass with a high school offense.  I know the Texas defense lost the KSU game, but I have to believe that if McCoy hadn’t been injured they would have won that game.  Had he not still been feeling the effects of that injury against the Aggies, Texas probably would have scored a few more points and won that game as well.  The odd thing about that game is that the Mack Brown/Greg Davis m.o. is to protect their players.  Why, then, was the game plan not designed to protect McCoy — i.e., two tight ends or tight end and a full back paving the way for Charles and Young?

Rant 2: The Alamo Bowl is a shitty, shitty bowl, but one bonus to not winning the Big 12 is they not having to play Boise State.  I really wish the Horns could have landed the Gator, for recruiting purposes.  I’m not sure why the Cotton Bowl didn’t seem to even consider Texas.  The second team in the South is still the second team in the whole conference.  Nebraska should be in the Holiday and ATM in the Alamo.  Whatever, I just hope Texas manages enough interest to win.

Rant 3:  Gene Chizik did not earn his check this year.  Failing to stop the option, when you know it is coming and it is not being run by the 1995 Nebraska Cornhuskers, is ridiculous.  Letting K-State go off for 45 points is similarly ludicrous.  Having Baylor and Iowa State QBs carve up your defense is unpardonable.  I suspect he had been in contact with Iowa State for weeks prior to the announcement that he would be the new head coach.  That is downright treacherous and likely contributed to the two losses.

Rant 4:  Michigan would absolutely donkey punch Florida this year.  If you want to see the two best teams play for the title you want to see a Michigan-Ohio State rematch.  Instead you get to see Troy Smith go roughneck upside the Gators’ collective anus.  Playoffs are the only viable option, and since football does not allow for the number of games a traditional tournament would require, the conference championship games should be the first round of a 16-team playoff.   The champions of the ACC, SEC, Big 12, Big 10, Pac 10, Big East, C-USA, MAC, WAC, SunBelt, and Mountain West get automatic bids, with 5 at-large spots.  If an additional 8 games are not feasible, then an 8-team playoff of just the champions of the first six conferences (ACC through Big East) get automatic bids with two at large spots.  This is simple and eliminates controversy.  Bowl games should attempt to transform into pre-season games, like the early basketball tournaments are now.  Good nonconference games that don’t impact conference standing.  Q: Why is this not happening?  A: Because the people with money aren’t concerned about the integrity of the product they’re peddling.

Rant 5:  VY is an inhuman force of victory.  His presence in Nebraska pulled that game out this year.  Had he been on the sidelines for the K-State and Aggie games Texas would have won.  This is not even debatable.  He is already making teams that passed on him in the draft look foolish.

Rant 6:  I don’t know a whole hell of a lot about coaching college football, despite my more than slight obsession with it.  However, I still have an opinion on whom the Longhorns should hire to replace Chizik.  The names I’ve seen tossed around are Randy Shannon (DC Univ. of Miami),  Joe Kines (DC Univ. of Alabama), and Jerry Gray (secondary/CBs coach Washington Redskins).  I would like to see Bo Pellini (DC LSU) on the list, but I doubt he’s available.  Kines or Gray could be acceptable, if not huge hires, but I would stay away from anybody associated with Miami.  Gray is the most appealing choice to me because he’s an alumnus of Texas, his specialty is where the Horns need to improve, and he’s from the pros and black, which could be important recruiting pearls.  I’d also give consideration to the Virginia Tech coordinotor, but his name is Bud Foster, and dude’s named Bud are just not winners.  I don’t care what Steve Levitt says.

Rant 7:  I have read internet rumors that Greg Davis is being considered for the vacant head coaching job at UAB, where Mack Brown’s brother is the athletic director (and former head football coach).  Now, I put no faith in these rumors whatsoever, but I wanted to point out that losing Davis at this juncture is a bad idea.  Don’t get me wrong, I think Greg Davis sucks out loud at making game time decisions.  His worst trait by far is developing at least one personnel package that tells the defense exactly what play is about to be run.  For years it was the Bret Robin draw play.  Now it’s the Henry Melton 6-inch dive.  Why does he never use these packages as a decoy?  Had Colt run a play action bootleg run-pass option on that fourth and inches play against the Aggies, Texas would have scored a touchdown because every single defender would have bitten on the fake to Melton since everyone in the world knew what the play was going to be as soon as they lined up over the ball.   So I hope it’s clear that I think Davis sucks and has cost Texas multiple games, including some games with very big implications.

But.

This is not the year for Texas to replace an offensive coordinator.  The schedule next year is primed for a run at the title, and Colt will be in his third year in the offense and, presumably, have more leeway to audible out of the total dumbshit calls Davis is prone to sending in at crucial moments.  If the interior line can grow up quickly they should be good enough to overcome the Davis factor.  The only hope for that is if they are not learning a completely new system.

Rant 8:  If Davis is gone, though, I would want Gary Crowton from the University of Oregon to replace him.  Crowton has coached at the NFL level, which could help with recruiting, and he’s been successful wherever he’s been.  This season the Ducks ranked 17th in scoring offense, but this was only 5.5 points per game less than Texas, ranked 5th.  In total yards Oregon was ahead of Texas, but with the same 5.9 yards per play average, the big difference being the balance exhibited by the Oregon offense.  The Ducks averaged 5.2 yards per rush and 6.6 yards per pass attempt (10.9 per completion) compared to the Longhorns’ 4.4 yards per rush and 8.1 yards per pass attempt (12.2 per completion).

Rant 9:  None of the above discussion regarding the UT football team matters one bit so long as Joe Walker remains on the staff.  Fire him and send him to a Siberian gulag for the remainder of his life.  I cry out and thirst for justice, yet my voice is not heard, and my thirst goes unslaked.

Rant 10 (well, not so much a rant as just a list of miscellaneous crap that doesn’t fit elsewhere):  I’ve read the following books recently: Freakonomics, Mists of Avalon, Rammer Jammer Yellowhammer, Palindrome, and To Air is Human.  Everyone should read Freakonomics — it’s brilliant.  I have nothing to add to Chris’s discussion of it, except to point out that Dr. David Hillis, of UT Southwestern, is quoted prominently in the book.

Mists of Avalon did not stand up well to a re-reading.  I first read it over a decade ago and loved it.  Back then I believe I was moved by the power of the ideas (feminism and religious pluralism mainly), but now I see only the spotty character development, plot breakdowns, and outright editorial gaffes.  I hate it when that happens.  I’m never re-reading another book ever.

Rammer Jammer Yellowhammer is an excellent book detailing one man’s year spent RVing to an entire season’s worth of Alabama Crimson Tide football games.  His helplessly self-aware appraisal of football fanaticism is insightful and often humorous.  On a rare occasion the author gets bogged down in the philosophical ponderings of the meaning of being a fan, but on the whole it’s a great read.

Palindrome sucked.  I can honestly say that I could write a better book than that.  The author plainly did zero research for his novel and made blatant mistakes in discussing the following subjects: football (he had an NFL starting tailback listed as 6′3″ 185), medicine (the doctors in this book clearly never went to medical school), law (a lawyer managed a million dollar settlement from a professional football team and player in less than 15 minutes), and psychology (apparently all twins are psychic, I know because the psychologist character in this book studied twins and found that to be the case even though that fact would have little to no bearing on the plot).

I’m still reading To Air is Human but so far it’s pretty good stuff about internation air guiatar championships.  Apparently the big draw is getting to live the drunken life of a rock star without struggling to play a real instrument.